I like The Company Store. They're online. They have the good shit, like zillion thread count sheets with a killer warranty and in a zillion colors. And hypoallergenic down alternative comforters (and down too, for the same price), and quilts that I want to own all of because I have a Quilt Thing.

Purple hides blood pretty good. So does black. And Cranberry.

And I have NEVER questioned your feminininnnnity. Or whatever. Just your relative sanity, and that's just cos you married the Human Inner Tube and for no other reason. But you got over that. :P